Strengthening the Meaningful things in Life -

Working on School-Family Education for Work-Life Effectiveness

As a values-based business, we live our belief that our for-profit work is only a means to meeting real needs, which in the whole scheme of things overshadow the profit motive. In today's 'push-button' world of instant gratification, it is meaningful to work with community partners whose mission goals focus on nurturing relationships. This article puts the spotlight on how parents can be Work-Life Effective and shares 3 key ideas that can immediately be put into action by our readers.

Since the middle of 2006, we have been speaking at schools on the Ministry of Community, Youth and Sports' platform of School-Family Education, to help equip parents, teachers and students. Part of the work is carried out in collaboration with Care Corner Family Service Centre, Tung Ling Community Services and St Andrew's Lifestreams. (The work done by the 3 groups will be the focus of a forthcoming article)

Navigating job demands and office politics daily, and going home to the task of nurturing a family is no mean feat, even for the best of us. Balancing the competing demands of parenthood and livelihood can be made less painful if parents, both as individuals and as a couple, can align goals and resources to their values.

Clarifying Values

Our values drive our behaviour, and they reflect what's important to us. When values are not aligned, the resulting situation is conflict, both within the individual and with others. While the conflict signals a need to seek re-alignment, it is often the heat and emotion of conflict that clouds the actions and decisions of both parties in a marriage.

It is vital for parents to clarify their own personal values and to actively seek convergence on values that are not yet shared. Through an active, open and continuing dialogue, parents can work and move together in concert. That way, both spouses build trust in each other's parenting actions even if one has to make a unilateral decision first. Working spouses can then focus on matters at work

Develop a Family Life Plan

It may be a cliche, but there is truth in the saying that those who fail to plan, plan to fail. It's true not just for business, but equally vital for family, all the more when it seems the least likely aspect of life that requires a plan. A Family Life Plan essentially maps out the family's goals, key milestones in the process of achieving those goals, and the primary actions that need to be taken to achieve those goals. These goals are by no means focused only on the material, but include other priorities such as children's education, holidays, retirement and the place of work within that plan etc, the Life Plan becomes a platform for both spouses to share and work on. Couples may explore flexible work-arrangements in order to pursue their life goals together. The Life Plan is not cast in stone, but becomes a work-in-progress as the family grows and takes shape.

Stop expecting perfection

At work or at home, it's also important to remember that there's a fine line between something done well and something done to perfection. Trying to get everything done perfectly is impossible, worse when it comes to our expectations of our spouses to be able to do something to our level of 'perfection'. It makes better sense to do something well, because the person receiving it is still likely to accept it for the effort that has been put in. It's easier as then you'd be placing less stress on yourself to perform and to juggle the task along with the other priorities of life.

Noel Tan

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