Role-modelling EQ: A Reflection

In the middle of the year, we were part of a consortium that recently completed a pilot project with a school to develop Emotional Literacy skills in a group of Sec 2 Normal Tech boys. Social and Emotional Learning research suggests that with enhanced EQ, students' academic performance improves.

When my facilitation team and I first met the participants, we primarily saw 2 key behaviours on display - aggression and passivity. Clearly, these belied the lack of confidence and esteem that are otherwise found in resilient kids. We saw as our primary task to model the EQ competencies which included the need to engage in thinking about consequences, recognising and harnessing emotions etc.

One pitfall in modelling EQ skills is in not knowing where to draw the line between acceptable and unacceptable behaviour. We found that however clear the behavioural expectations were and however much we reiterated these expectations, these would obviously not be met by a few individuals. We also discovered that no matter how much we shared amongst ourselves what these expectations were and what would we all do if they were not met, ultimately different people have different thresholds for unacceptable behaviour.

So the key lesson through our own debriefing as a facilitation team was to have each facilitator share and account for their individual response to unacceptable behaviour. Knowing the logic for our responses allowed each facilitator to move towards a 'normed' response that everyone would adopt in the event.

Role-modelling EQ also meant that we had to come to terms with our own lack of these EQ competencies. Not being able to explain why we react a certain way when we feel stressed or fatigued, may mean that we may have limited reach into the child's life when debriefing his behaviour and feelings under stress or fatigue.

On hindsight, there is great potential in terms of impact on these kids who in their home life, have not had positive models of EQ. We showed that while we were there to model the competencies, we also had our own thresholds for negative behaviour and had to deal with them firmly. Through our positive management of our emotions, we showed them that they could too.

Noel Tan
(*All text is copyright of Trailblazer Trainers Pte Ltd)

SELF-AWARENESS FOR EDUCATOR EFFECTIVENESS

Self-Awareness is the foundation of Personal Effectiveness which in turn also forms the basis of Professional Effectiveness. It enables individuals to accept or change who they are, and take charge of their own lives. The opposite is true: not being self-aware, may lead to them succumbing to external circumstances. Personal effectiveness arises when one operates skills related to EQ, time management, stress management, decision-making and interpersonal relationships to appropriately meet the daily challenges of life.

For educators, self-awareness is critical given the demands of the profession. Like practitioners in other 'helping' professions such as social work or nursing, the most meaningful and rewarding aspects of the job require an outpouring of oneself to one's charges, running at crossed purposes with the daily grind of the 'system'. Without self-awareness, educators may face premature burnout, high stress, an ongoing internal conflict and disillusionment, amongst other occupational hazards.

A Self-Aware Educator:

• Recognises his strengths and weaknesses

All of us operate foremost based on our strengths, as they have served us well over time. Because teaching is challenging on every imaginable front, educators can only benefit from gaining clarity of their strengths as these will be the key to overcoming such challenges.

Where there are weaknesses, then self-awareness allows individuals to take steps to managing them. One way is to work consistently for improvement with a senior teacher who could function as a mentor or a coach. The other is to find a peer whose area of strength is in the same dimension as one's weakness. In other words, recognising one's weakness allows one to shore up and leverage where there is a lack.

• Recognises his preferences and areas of avoidance

People also operate largely on the basis of preferences. We enjoy working on things that we prefer, because they create less internal tension and require less energy. Yet, personal ineffectiveness can occur when we act only on our preferences. That is, we may prefer to have a 'flexible' definition of deadlines, but acting on that preference alone, may lead to poor execution, limited room for manoeuvre, and also disapproval from peers and supervisors; amongst other things. Hence, educators need to identify their areas of preference and to restrain reliance on these.

In the Herrmann Brain Dominance Instrument (aka the HBDI; a psychometric tool we use), respondents are also acquainted with the areas of avoidance - things that they do not like doing. A similar case can be made that where individuals can identify situations to avoid, then they can take pre-emptive steps to prevent these situations from emerging. Given that it is impossible to avoid such situations 100% of the time, recognising them would at least give individual educators a basis to mentally prepare for them.

• Identifies his stressors and energizers accurately

Stressors are our 'buttons' that we don't want pushed. These could range from tasks that we don't enjoy or maintaining relationships with people that we can't stand. For educators, stressors could be managing a perpetually noisy class, a student who misbehaves or even a supervisor or colleague that they can't get along with. Stressors not only drain us but can also push us into the very areas of avoidance that we recognise that we do not prefer and that we may operate from weakness. Being aware of specific stressors gives us the potential to devise strategies to manage them better.

Educators should also identify their energizers: elements in their life which add zest or revive flagging spirits. These include engaging in pursuits that they enjoy - reading a good book, watching an uplifting movie, being with good friends, holidays abroad, doing community work etc. Especially in a helping profession like teaching, educators need time to be 'filled' again in order to be effective.

Social and Emotional Learning (SEL) research positions Self-Awareness as a key pillar of SEL thinking, where students model their social and emotional intelligence on the behaviours of teachers, so that learning can take place more effectively. It seems clear that self-awareness is not just information that is good to know, but in fact essential for schools to truly become learning communities.

Noel Tan

(*All text is copyright of Trailblazer Trainers Pte Ltd, 2006)